Sunday, February 23, 2014

Warning: Crazy Mama will Kick Your Arse

It appears as though high school can bring out the worst in a person - and by person I mean me, the adult, the parent.  Last week  you know that we attended the cheer competition and it brought out the nasty in me, as shared in this oh so wonderful blog.  But I can't help it - when you put my kid under a microscope I go all mad scientist, Dr. Evil, and begin plotting world dominance...where everything will be magically transformed into rainbows, cotton candy and unicorns.  Not really,  because all of that stuff makes my gag reflex kick in, but you get my point - mess with my kid and mama bear is pissed and ready to kick your arse... taking a piece of your hide for a souvenir.  Damn, look at me going all Billy Bad Ass - I might even be able to take on a zombie or two, if need be.

But no matter how irritated, angry and irrational I get about my kids being dissed, it's irrelevant because, ironically, neither one of my kids really needs my help to fight their battles.  I'd like to think it is because we've raised them to be their own people - and I'm sure that my continuously telling them 'you are awesome and haters are just jealous arse-faces' has helped, right?

My issue (yes, I said MY) lies with eldest daughter, C: smart, kind and giving- but she is also aloof (a sweet way to say she lacks common sense) and judgmental. She is not (?!) concerned about pleasing her peers, nor does she work at maintaining friendships - if they like her, oh well, if they don't, oh well.  If they ramble on about nonsensical boy issues she doesn't have time for you - she sees the frivolity of being a teenager as a complete and utter waste of time.  Hard work, determination and dedication to making the world a better place, yeah, that's her gig.  Wow, she is so unlike me at that age!

Side Note:  She does seek my approval, especially when getting dressed (Yay! A normal teen trait that I can relate to!).

So, if she can handle herself, what's the issue?  Bullies, that's the issue and believe me, the irony that I want to bully the bullies is not falling short on me.  But isn't it my job, as a loving, caring mother to protect her from the skanks and the skags that are oh so ready to rip her to shreds (mind you, these are spoiled white chicks that are haters, so no real physical fighting will take place, just words via social networks - no racial bias here, just calling it like it is)?  Or is it my job to empower her with the grace and dignity (that she already possesses) and step back and fight her own fight, her way?

Man, this parenting teen stuff is tough and personal...because really, all of this is more about me than her.  Back in the day, I allowed others to determine my worth.  I worked hard, too hard, to be cool.  I skipped a lot of school in junior high to avoid being teased and taunted over things that I should have just brushed off.  And although all of that happened a billion years ago and things got much better as I got older, the wounds are still there and I don't want my kids or anybody else's for that matter, to hurt like I did.

Aww hell, this is not a pity party - just a bit of a revelation that I've had somersaulting around in my little brain for awhile and I guess it was ready to come tumbling out.

Now that I've opened up this big ol' can of worms, what to do?  I believe that there is only one thing to do and that's prevention peeps, prevention through empowerment.  Empower our children, yours & mine, to be unique, kind, caring individuals who kick ass in the face of adversity.  Bam, that's it.  Peace out my friends..until next week.

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